More Dead Pets

Quite a while ago, I wrote about how good my family was at killing off pets. What I've neglected to tell you is that hasn't deterred us from buying more. This summer, we brought home a Betta for The Kitten's birthday.

Poor little thing died within two months. Being a bit older, The Kitten understood this a lot better than she did with the turtle or the hamsters. There's a memorial in the backyard. So did we stop there?

Of course not. I came home from my wonderful weekend of wine and music to find two guppies and a frog in the tiny Betta bowl. The frog jumped ship within a few days, but the guppies, they held on until the brilliant man I married put them in untreated tap water for too long last night. I hope The Kitten meant it when she was wailing about "No more pets!" She seemed genuinely happy when I told her Santa would bring her a Fin Fin Friend instead.

We are now accepting contracts on any pets you might want to meet an untimely death. Satisfaction guaranteed.