Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Free Lessons in Destructive Criticism

I was waiting for a picture of me, with glowing eyes, actually jumping on the back of a poor, innocent opposing skater, but Death By Chocolate commented me with this lolcat gem that just hit the spot:

Humorous Pictures

I was ejected from the Brawlers' amazing victory over ACRD's Bombshell Brigade for fighting. I decided to take matters into my own hands when one of their skaters decided to block me with an elbow from out of bounds completely around the rink. Maybe constructive feedback would have stopped at jumping on her back, but I guess the stressful week of derby I had just lived through convinced me to take a few jabs at her face after ripping her helmet off. I crossed the line into destructive. At least my team didn't self-destruct.

Sunday night was a crowd-pleaser, and boy, did HRD need one. The home team worked on a slight blowout (Brawlers 123, Brigade 100), and the underdog won the second bout by one point (Betties 77, Sirens 76). The fans raved over the showmanship and the suspense. My ego loves it when the fans rave.

Then Monday morning comes bright and early as it always does after bout nights, and Sharon Stone couldn't have asked for a better example of karma. When your shower caddy falls and leaves a six-inch contusion on your calf muscle after your fist put a knot the size of a quarter on a derby girl's forehead...now that's karma. You should have seen what I did to that caddy. Beware of the Catazon, inanimate objects and sloppy skaters!


  1. LMAO, sorry "bout" the caddy thing tho. Owie. I have a feeling you made it through the pain.

  2. Making it through the pain is so much easier when I think of my better half running around the house looking for where the big CRASH is coming from this time. I've always said I'm going to die in an accident, but I'm beginning to believe it might be an accident at home. Crazy.

  3. She had it coming. It's like if you go to a concert and start kicking the seat in front of you, and this really tough chick is sitting in the chair getting pissed... it's not like you don't know that chick is going to turn around and pop you. Right? She had it coming, and she knew it was coming. It's derby for crying out loud!!
    It was an AMAZING bout!! I can't wait for the next one... who's to say HRD won't take down the Texicutioners!?!?!!!

  4. Bring on the Texecutioners!!! Unfortunately, as captain, I must behave that night. ;)

    You fans made it a great bout, too!

  5. Dude... check you out!!


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